Ah, the sleeping babe. Nothing could be more precious, more innocent...
And then he woke up and dialed 911 without us knowing it.
Picture it--A weekday. I'm at work, and Drew is talking to his mom on the phone while he starts changing Silas' diaper. Silas doesn't like diaper changes. Hates them in fact. But he does like phones. So, Drew gets off the phone with his mom and hands it to Silas to keep him busy while the diaper change is in progress. Silas starts pressing buttons, as per usual. Drew thinks Silas might be pressing too many buttons, so he takes the phone away from him. Silas protests. The diaper change ends. Life goes on.
And then the phone rings. It's a 911 operator who tells Drew they just received a call from our number. Drew then has to explain that his 1 year old dialed the number. No it's not on speed dial, it was random (what are the odds?). No, he's not being held at gunpoint and being forced to say that his 1 year old dialed the number, and by the way, are we going to be fined for this?
The operator said that they may still have to send a patrol car around, just in case. But the police never materialized, so they must have believed Drew when he said that he wasn't being held hostage. And we haven't been fined. Silas is no longer allowed to play with the phone, unless it's been unplugged.
Did I mention that he gave me a black eye? What a little devil. This happened three weeks ago while Drew was in WI. I was still lying in bed, which is on the floor, and Silas had already gotten up. He picked out a book and very excitedly brought it back to me so that I could read it to him. On the way to the bed, he tripped and slammed the corner of the hardcover book right into my eye. Holy cats! I've never had a black eye before. It took 3 weeks for it to totally heal, and it wasn't even a very bad shiner. I had no idea it would take so long to heal, because on TV, it only seems to take a few days and then people always returned to their flawless skinned selves.
Si is also going through a biting/grabbing/pulling/pinching faze. The bitting can be explained by the fact that he's getting so many teeth in at the same time. We're up to 12 at last count, and 4 or those are the recently cut molars. More appear to be on their way. While I understand that teething is painful, it is still disconcerting to have him run up to me while I'm doing dishes as though he's going to hug me, and then end that hug by chomping into my leg. Ow. He just can't seem to help himself. Same goes for the grabbing/pulling/pinching. He gets so excited sometimes and he doesn't know that he's hurting. He seems to think he's playing with us. But we're always very firm with him. Unfortunately, we've been told that at his age, he can't really remember that it's a bad thing and causes us pain. At some point, however, it's gotta sink in, right?
So, let's recap. Sleeping cherub. Dialing 911 emergency when the only emergency in progress is an unwanted diaper change. General parental abuse. I think the picture below seems more accurate then the sleeping babe portrait, at present. You don't think they're sharing a brewsky and conspiring against me, do you? If so, I'm really in trouble!
6 years ago